Sunday, January 3, 2010

When You Really Love Someone

When you really love someone ... everyone should see it.

I've known this woman for 11 years. We work together at the credit union.

In those 11 years, I've never heard a cross word about her husband.

Huh? Yes, you read that right ...

I mean ... never a "he's driving me crazy", "he just doesn't get it", "he's so selfish", "why can't he remember to put his clothes in the hamper"... none of those things.

On Tuesday of last week, her husband suffered a massive heart attack. He didn't make it.

As I heard the news, I began thinking about their relationship. They were happy together. Everyone knew it, everyone could see it ... what will she do without him? I talked with one of our co-workers and she agreed. There was just something about them and their marriage.

Later in the day, my thoughts turned to my own marriage ... my husband. What would I do without him? If anything happened to one of us ... what would others say about our marriage and relationship? Does my husband know how much I love him, how much he means to me and how lost I would be without him? Do other people see how much I love him?

These are the things I love about my husband ...

His brown eyes, his smile, his sense of humor (most of the time, LOL) ...

This morning, Jerry (my husband) is at work. This past week, he worked 87 hours. I don't measure his worth by how many hours he works, but I love him for working so hard to provide for me and our boys. He was unemployed for 8 months and we're still catching up on our finances. All the hours he put in last week will get us to that goal a lot faster.

For my birthday last year, he gave me a coffee maker. One that brews a cup at a time and he gave me a box of flavored coffee to go with it. He saved a little money out of each unemployment check to buy that for me. I love my coffee maker ... but I love the fact he thought ahead even more.

When we go out to eat as a family, he lets me pick the restaurant. Even though he knows it's going to be Azteca's (my favorite restaurant, not his) for the hundredth time!

He offers to go grocery shopping with me and drives to the movie theater instead. I love those kind of surprises. He's good at that ... surprises. Like when he lights candles around our bathtub and lets me take a bath and read a book while he takes care of our boys. Or, when he shows up at work with my favorite cup of coffee ... just because. Or, he sends me a text during the day just to say he loves me and is thinking about me.

Do you love someone? Really love them ... love them with actions that speak so much louder than the words "I love you"? Yes, the words are important. But, this past week, I learned that the lack of words can say "I love you". My co-worker didn't say cross things about her husband, she didn't complain about him. Without speaking a word ... she said ... she loved him.

Thank you ... Dave and Anita ... for teaching me this lesson.

1st John 3:18 "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth."


  1. Hi Aine -

    Thanks for visiting my blog and becoming a Follower. I've added my name to your Follower list.

    I, also, lost my beloved 2 1/2 years ago after a 14-month battle with leukemia. I'm grateful to the Lord for the years we had together.

    Treasure your loved ones, and let them know how much you appreciate them.


  2. Aine, the first line, when you really love someone,everyone should see it. I hope that's what my family and friends saw in Tim and I. Sometimes we don't outwardly show it but I hope it came from within. This one touched my heart, and, Jerry has grown into a wonderful husband and father, I am so proud of him. Love you, Barb

  3. Susan, I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for following my blog. It will be fun getting to know you through our blogs.

    Barb ... you and Tim ... yes, I saw it in you both. I always loved being around you two. I have great memories of the lake and swimming at your house. And, you are right ... Jerry has grown up pretty good :) Love ya :)

  4. Aine: Wow. God has given you a gift - what a blessing! I'm crying as I read this. Somehow Amanda directed me to your blog today and I read...and read...and read. I thank Him because I came across this one.

    I was very blessed to be so loved. The Lord gave us 26 years - 23 of them in marriage.

    Thank you for your words. Some days are harder than others -- and for some reason the last couple of days have been a doosey. Thank you. You are a beautiful person. God Bless you and your family.

  5. I am so blessed that you found my blog and have been touched by my words. When you trained me as a teller years ago ... I had no idea your marriage would change the way I live my marriage. But, God knew and He used our friendship to teach me something ... something I count as priceless.

    I am so sorry these past few days have been hard ... I can't imagine my life without Jerry.

    I'll be praying for you. Thank you for living your marriage in a way that ministered to so many. I count it a blessing to know you and to have witnessed the love in your marriage.

    God Bless you today, Aine